REALity Volume XXXVI Issue No. 8 August 2017
REAL Women of Canada’s National Vice-President’s Speech at the World Conference of Families XI
on the subject of “The Importance and Sanctity of Motherhood”
According to the heroic Hungarian Cardinal Jozsef Mindszenty, in his book The Mother (1949):
… the most important person on earth is a mother. She cannot claim the honour of having built Notre Dame Cathedral. She need not. She has built something more magnificent than any cathedral – a dwelling for an immortal soul, the tiny perfection of her baby’s body … The angels have not been blessed with such a grace.
Feminists in the western world have moved heaven and earth to try to induce women to diminish the role of motherhood, believing that it is detrimental to a fulfilled life. That is why they demand state run daycare programs so that a mother can have a third party look after her child so as not to be distracted from her real life, which is in the work place. Feminists argue that women’s interest in motherhood is merely socially constructed, and can be changed. However, pregnancy and childbirth are not gender neutral activities. The inconvenient truth is that equality in the workplace cannot compete with the inequality of nature, which, curiously, allows only women to become pregnant, never men. Curiously, too, women possess the inclination to nurture and, therefore, are more torn about work and family issues than are men. This is why mothers are much more attracted to part-time work than are fathers.
In a Gallop poll in the US, dated Oct. 7, 2015, it was found that the majority of women with children, if they have the financial choice to do so, prefer the homemaking role. The data show that, among mothers who are currently employed either full or part time, 40% say they would prefer to work outside the home. 54% would prefer to stay home. The figures are almost identical among mothers who aren’t currently employed. There is almost no difference in the lifestyle preference of fathers, according to their work status. At least 70% of those employed, as well as those not employed, would rather have a job outside the home.
Feminists and totalitarian governments have tried to bring changes to ignore motherhood, under the guise of raising the status of women by promoting gender equality, supposedly to empower women. These ideologies anticipated that women, once educated and economically independent, would voluntarily separate themselves from the “liability” of religion and culture, family and children because the progressives believe that such commitments are impediments that have enslaved women for centuries. Emancipation from these responsibilities makes abortion and population control programs more acceptable and makes women more available to be in the paid workforce in order that their employment will improve the economy.
How little do the ideologues know and understand women! Our children and our families are at the very core of our being. They are not merely a side car attached to our lives, but the central part of our lives. This is because there are striking differences between men and women, not just in our obvious physical differences, but also in that women have a greater inclination to nurture infants and children, which is rooted in the endocrine system and women’s brain structure. Women’s bodies have more receptors for the nurturing hormone, oxytocin, than do men, especially in pregnancy and during breastfeeding. More recent imaging research shows that mothers’ brains change during pregnancy and after birth in ways that seem to increase their “emotional attachment to their babies.” The profound love that a mother feels toward her child is unmatched and little understood until a woman becomes a mother.
Consequently, despite intense pressure from feminists, social engineers, economists and population controllers, and totalitarian governments, they have not been able to change the nature of women, whether they are in the workforce or in the home. The fact is, women’s nature is to be the tutor and nurturer and is the cement of society. Her children, regardless of her professional achievements, are her great work in life. This is because a conscientious mother is responsible for developing her child’s character, teaching that child principles and religious faith, family history and how to relate to other individuals in appropriate ways. She, as no other human being, can both feel the hurts and experience the joys of her children, providing them with strength and courage in their journey through life.
It is this intense, unselfish relationship that gives the child a sense of security and confidence to face life’s challenges. The family is the only institution ever invented to provide children with a love that is centred on them. All other institutions, including schools and day care, are intentionally designed to be impartial. But, in order for children’s personalities to develop in a healthy manner, it is necessary that someone care intensely for them; so intensely as to give them priority over all other children. It is within the family, and especially with the mother, enabled by the support of the father, that this kind of love and intense caring usually takes place.
Mikhail Gorbachev, in his book, Perestroika: New Thinking for our Country and the World (1988), acknowledged that the dysfunction in Soviet society, as evidenced by pervasive alcoholism, high divorce and abortion rates, and very low birth rates, etc. may well have been caused by this separation of very young children from their mothers. We should heed his warning.
Nature made women, not men, the prime tutor and nurturer of love and it is this love that drives women to make their children and families their priority in life, regardless of their professional or employment achievements. This is, indeed, fortunate for society as well as for women because there is no higher happiness and joy than giving birth and nurturing life.
This, however, is not to presume that we are all perfect mothers, because we are not. We are not “superwomen”: we can feel overwhelmed, exhausted and stressed out in our role as mothers, complicated frequently by our role in the workplace. This does not make for an easy life. Nonetheless, being a mother is one of women’s greatest responsibilities, challenges, privileges and opportunities. The experiences of some mothers, too, is that they may have a difficult time within their families, due to poor health, mental illness, depression, unemployment, divorce and many other human problems. Our vocation or calling is complex and constant. Difficult moments occur in loving, though imperfect homes, but mothers are there giving their extraordinary effort to the next generation.
Even imperfect motherhood, combined with dedication, can overcome these challenges, and can lead to healthy children, who are able to create a stable society. Strong families make strong nations. It is the mother, at the heart of the family, who makes this happen. Mothers change the future through their children. Therefore, her work must be respected, encouraged and supported.