REALity Volume XXV Issue No.2 February 2016
Dr. Dorothy Patterson is a Professor of Theology in Women’s Studies at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary in Fort Worth Texas. This is an edited version of Dr. Patterson’s speech presented to the World Congress of Families IX held from October 27th to 30th, 2015.
WHY MOTHERS ARE SO IMPORTANT
By: Dr. Dorothy Patterson
Being a mother is both demanding and rewarding—and it is equivalent to a professional pursuit. No one—teacher, psychologist, or spiritual leader—has the opportunity to mold minds, heal spirits, nurture bodies, and develop potential as does a mother. Despite its pressures and difficulties, this job can be amazingly productive and overwhelmingly rewarding, and the results of competent mothering will be passed from generation to generation! For such an awesome assignment, a mother dare not look at rearing her children as merely one of her mundane responsibilities but rather as a highest priority in her life.
Yet why do fewer and fewer women willingly and joyfully commit themselves to this task? Some women see virtue in putting a lock on their wombs, determining that this would be a burden on their marriages and lives.
Children bring changes and sacrifices far beyond the financial challenges. A mother loses much of her privacy and sometimes experiences radical changes to her entire lifestyle. There are no guarantees—children may bring disappointments and sorrows. Yet the job of motherhood offers the highest level of service. You cannot pay a woman to do what mothers do for free. A mother’s commitment to the care of her children would be considered irrational by some. Her rewards are not materialistic benefits that fade but intangible rewards of blessings and honor that will last through eternity.
I see the home as essential for the production of moral, social, and human capital—the work forces and visionary leaders needed for the future. This process, when done with excellence, cannot be short-circuited, mechanized, or standardized to one-size-fits-all.
Far beyond keeping her child clothed, sheltered, fed, and educated, a conscientious mother is responsible for developing her child’s character and teaching him how to relate to other individuals in appropriate ways and how to pursue work with integrity and excellence; she, as no other human being, can feel his hurts and experience his joys, building his confidence and fortifying him with courage for the journey of life.
Remembering the screen classic Magnificent Obsession, I want to challenge this generation of mothers to embrace their own magnificent obsession, i.e., complete dedication to the task of nurturing their children. Such indeed is considered abnormal by many who look at the task of maternity as perfunctory and without need for preparation or training and certainly not the most important task a woman should pursue. Yet, what a difference could be made if suddenly the home and family could be treated with the same importance as other professional pursuits.
What Is the Task of Maternity?
First, every woman must be aware of the design and purpose for her body. She is equipped to be the “life bearer,” to conceive, carry, and nurture in her body the beginning of life. She is tied in a unique way to the beginning of life in her womb. Her exclusive role in procreation and her unique human tie with her offspring positions a mother as central in her family and with influence far beyond the family circle. Throughout the generations many have acknowledged that the mother in her home is the last bastion against the immorality and amorality of decadent society. She plays a major role in establishing the values and character not only of her children but also of a nation.
Second, mothers have the potential to be the rock of strength and haven of protection for their vulnerable children. A mother who is anchored in her own faith and whose character is settled in her own life is going to be a formidable influence on her offspring. Just knowing that someone cares for him and is committed to him above every earthly endeavor gives a child confidence for whatever obstacles he may face and serves as a mooring for him in the storms of life.
Third, mothers have the opportunity to lay the foundation for all learning—not just what will be transmitted in the classroom but also the development of skills in living day-by-day. Creating an educational setting that encourages learning demands some important elements: sensory experiences, choices in the midst of daily activities, reading aloud, field trips, exposure to guests, opportunities for social interaction that span the generations. One thread running through the entire process is time and dedication to the task! You can study the lives of exemplary mothers, read books, listen to lectures, but most of all you must determine to build the young lives entrusted to you with personal attention and planning and the investment of all you are to the task—that means quantity as well as quality time.
Fourth, mothers have the opportunity to make their children feel that home is the happiest and best place in all the world—a choice gift indeed. Her daughters have the opportunity to model themselves after her example, and her sons can be inspired by her quiet but consistent encouragement; both daughters and sons are directed by her counsel and overshadowed by her virtues. The family mealtime is also an important key to making home special.
Conclusion
Perhaps the home is the toughest workplace of all. Its demands indeed are unrelenting and may even be unreasonable. A mother seems to be on call 24 hours a day and that without a basic wage, much less any overtime. We are not “pay-check mothers,” but we are “working mothers”! A mother will not be recognized nor thanked for her selfless labor. I consider the best present I have given my children to be my presence in their lives day in and day out. The best present they have given me is wrapped up in who they have become, the places they have taken in their own respective homes and the contributions they are making in the lives of their own families, friends, and even with the strangers who cross their paths.
There is no higher happiness and joy than birthing and nurturing life. Nothing in this world I have ever done—the writing of books, radio and television broadcasts, messages from the public platform, attaining multiple academic degrees, teaching classes, or traveling around the world—nothing equals the joy and satisfaction I have personally experienced in molding the lives of my children and then watching them walk across the stage of life, taking their places of service in the next generation.
For the complete video of Dr. Dorothy Patterson’s speech click here
Please visit Dr. Patterson’s website at http://dorothypatterson.org